Sunday, April 24, 2011

I'm flawed.

I’m a terrible liar, and therefore I’m always honest.  It always seems to get me in trouble.  I always put others before myself, and I have a hard time doing things for myself.  But on the rare occasion that I do, I’m seen as selfish.  I do things for people without motive or the expectation of being thanked.  I have a terrible time at telling people how I feel…which is why pretty much all of my relationships have failed.  I don’t let many people into my life because I’m afraid they’ll be like “all the others.”   I’m ready for a real relationship but I’m afraid I’ll never find “the one.”  Actually, I’m afraid that I had that person but messed things up.  I have a painful past, and I'm who I am today because of what I went through.  I’m emotional and wear my heart on my sleeve.  People never have to ask how I’m feeling because they just know.  I overanalyze situations and replay conversations in my head hoping that somehow they’ll go differently.  I’m humble.  I don’t realize how successful I actually am.  I’m not as confident as I should be. 

I’m flawed, but at least I’m real.

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