|At my heaviest weight in August 2012 right before I moved to Alabama|
There, I said it. I signed up for the race at the end of June. Up until now, it's mainly been a secret to most people (minus my boyfriend, sister, best friend and coworkers). To be honest, I've kept it a secret because I was scared that I'd fail.
For as long as I can I remember, I've been saying that I was going to lose weight and get into shape. But it never happened. Every time I try to lose weight, I gain it back. Every time I try to get into shape, I quit after a month. So this time, I thought it would be best not to say anything. But then I told my boyfriend. And my sister. And my coworkers. And when my boss asked me to set goals for myself after my 90-day review, one of them was "To complete a Tough Mudder." This time, I will not fail. And I have other people helping me and encouraging me to make sure that I don't.
It's been hard getting back into working out. On most days, I don't have any motivation to go on a run or press play on Turbo Fire. But I do it anyway. On most days, I don't see the results of all of my hard work. But some days, I try on clothes that haven't fit in over a year and I realize that it's working. Most days, I feel tired and sore. And quite frankly, I want to give up. But I don't...because I signed up for this Tough Mudder, and I'm going to conquer this thing.
Up until this point, my training has mainly consisted of running (I'm using the Couch to 5k app). I added in Turbo Fire a few days ago, and next month I'll be adding in strength training. On my first day of C25K, the intervals were run 1 minute and walk 90 seconds. I could barely get through it and my legs ached. Tonight, the intervals were run 5 minutes and walk 3 minutes. And you know what? I made that workout my bitch. I was running at a pace that felt impossible to me that first day, and I kept the same pace the entire time. I was exhausted when I was done, but it felt incredible to complete that run.
|At my lowest weight since junior year at FGCU.|
Taken on August 9, 2014
With all of this training, the weight has started to come off. It's been a slow journey, and for a few weeks, I was gaining weight instead of losing it. Since March, I've lost 17 pounds. However, I didn't start seeing results until a few weeks ago. After losing 10 pounds, my clothes still fit the same, and I was starting to get frustrated. It wasn't until I had lost 15 pounds that I started seeing results. Now, my clothes are looser, and I'm more comfortable wearing shorts and fitted shirts. But what's really been amazing is watching my confidence grow. I'm still not where I want to be, but I feel amazing! I wear compression shorts when I run, tank tops to work and shorts on the weekends - and I don't give a damn what people say about it. When you feel amazing, nothing can stop you from working toward your goals.
This journey is far from over. There's still 90 days until Tough Mudder, and I have so much work to do before then. But I believe in myself, and there are other people who believe in me too. There are days when my legs are sore, and I'm tired beyond belief. There are days when I finish a workout and all I want to do is cry because I didn't do as well as I could've. There are days when I think, "if I didn't give up last year, this wouldn't be so hard." But the love and encouragement from my boyfriend, family and coworkers is what keeps me going when all I want to do is quit. I refuse to let them down.
The best things in life aren't given. They're earned.
I Will What I Want - Under Armour Women